I stood waiting in a convenience store last night to use the ATM. A service technician was talking on a cell phone, trying to get somebody to help him validate that the machine was now working properly. Then he said, “If you just confirm this, I can get out of the way and let this patient lady behind me get her business done.” He smiled back over his shoulder.
I believe in the independence of women, equality of pay and opportunity, physical ability. As a trans-woman I expect to be treated that way in society as well. But before I can seem to get that far, I need to recognized as just that – a trans woman. As others said in that TG Day of Remembrance panel Saturday night, I need to be called by my chosen name. I need other people to refer to me as “she” and “her”. I need to be appreciated as a middle-aged woman (interesting panel comments on generational differences and what that means to be a trans woman or gender queer).
To be recognized – not stared at but treated as female in a matter of fact, common sense fashion – is what I need first. If my basic human identity is not recognized, nothing else will come. I am grateful for decent and thoughtful strangers.