I got sidetracked this morning, which is not particularly new. I was listening to George Harrison — Living in a Material World and I stumbled onto a song I didn’t remember. The song is “The Light that has Lighted the World’. I’m not sure why he wrote this song. It was a long time ago. But I know that song is about me and my gender identity.
Some people have said that I’ve changed, that I’m not the same person I was, and it really is a shame. They try to be polite. But I can tell in their voices and on their faces that I really should be feeling shame. When I feel happy because I have an identity future, when I feel free from the grip of addiction, some, maybe even many, do not accept that change. A perverse sense of judgment and righteousness overcomes their ability to look into the world for that Light. Nature must be wrong. Nature must be “rearranged”.
And then I find it so hard to move on out of that hole of depression.
Somehow George knew. He knew me. He knows you. Now I can be grateful for anybody who gives me hope that I can look and actually see the Light that has lighted the world. Thanks, George, wherever you are!